Monday, July 9, 2012

New York City Summertime

What time is it?  It’s summertime.  Are you stuck in New York City in the sweltering eye stabbing heat?  Are you wearing only two articles of clothing and taking cold showers in lieu of AC?  Do you only see the light of day before 9am or after 9pm? Well if so, we are on the same boat and even though it sort of stanks (especially in Chinatown) it is still a fabtastic boat to be on.  New York City in the summer is great, truly it is.  People are nicer, things are sexier, all the hullabaloo of capitalist climbing is a bit subdued, or at least more tipsy from all the daytime boozing.  Yes, there is the influx of sandal-socked wearing tourists with their hair cut and their jeans distressed in a certain way that makes you go, “gah” inside, but this is also oddly charming, all that enthusiasm for a place you call home.  So if you are not a rich bastard or bastette (nor have disposable access to those likes), and you can’t jaunt off and stay at some linen pillowed house near a body of water for days, weeks, or months on end, have no envy because you are here in New York City which has more summer time fun then a table of crabs with a mallet.

Below are a few fun things one can do, see, taste, try out that will make a city summer super fun. 

The Beach – Yes, New York has a lot of them.  Go to as many as possible.  I go to Jacob Riis, which edges Fort Tilden, and although the hipster/hippie chic of the later is a bit much for me, I hover nearby so that I can still drink some beers or vodka unremorsefully.  Vodka at the beach is swell.  Drink in small sips only though.  Bring an umbrella or a sheet to make an umbrella, make a light lunch, bring ice cubes and water, bring a ball or two and don’t forget a book.  Everyone is always happy at the beach.  The ocean is also nature’s spa treatment, sun, sand, and exfoliation.  

Walking Around Aimlessly – My new favorite thing to do.  Start somewhere, anywhere, go towards water.  Reach water and turn another direction.  The streets, shops, dogs, old people sitting about is just the most charmed thing about this town.  Buildings start feeling like people and the tiny/vast conundrum of the city is more palpable.  Doing this with one other person is ideal.  Talking and walking have a similar pace.  It gives you time to think and to process but also to progress in an unobliged sort of way. 

The Met (Museum of Art) – A good place to remind oneself of the big picture and also how art is not only for a small minority of society.  Also, every time I go, I see something new that makes me think about other things I had already been thinking about in different ways.  You also get this colossal sense of humanity in the best ways and the worst ways.  All those screaming children, the leg tired guards, the gift shop, but then you also feel the desperate need for humanity to be known, remembered.  It’s soothing in its inevitability.

Parks – Grass smells good.  Lying in the grass with a friend or two makes you feel like you are collegiate or French or mildly satisfied with the way your life has gone thus far.  Any situation where your nose is only inches from the earth is an interesting one to be in.  There is also the people watching that is more then acceptable in grass lounging situations.  Everyone is creating their own petite-fete and everyone wants to be both private and social all at once.  The only down side is that restrooms at these locals are scarce and scary. 

Rooftops – Going to a roof, any roof, in any part of the city is always a treat.  They are usually very unsafe and many times have nothing but a view and difference in perspective to give.  Some have tables, chairs, grills, and other things to make sitting and eating easier and these are fun but most times I would prefer an empty roof.  Always at night or just at dawn. 

Iced Drinks – An iced coffee is like having an i-phone, You just gotta have one!  Joking aside, it really is the most refreshing thing you can have while walking in NYC’s blazing asphalt streets.  It cools your little insides and also gives you a tweek in caffeine or in sugars.  Chewing the left over ice or letting it melt into a diluted watery version of whatever you had in the cup is nice as well.  Buying an iced drink for a pal is always one of the nicest things one can do when it is hot outside.

AC – There are places in the city that are hotter then the mouth of hell, like everywhere, but then there are surprising refuges from this that blast AC and make you realize that you’re a lil bitch and your ancestors would slap you in the face for whining about the heat.  One place with supurb AC, most of the time, is subway cars.  The contrast of waiting like pissed off animals with tons of other people in dark, smelly stations to those doors opening and you can feel the goosh of cold air coming out is amazing.  Also movie theatres are a godsend.  Dark, frozen, visual audio mind numbing makes you feel a million miles away from your hot ass apartment. Also, libraries are super great to chill out and not have Weezer and mocha-somethings invading your brain.

Sexy Time – Yes, New York has a lot of good-looking people.  I have to admit, they are not the best looking in the obvious way, like for sure Sweden and small cities in France or small villages in Malaysia or Malawi would kick our butts in the looks department, but NYC has the functional weirdoes, crazies, and stylish misfits.  Their type of sexy is not in the symmetry of their face but in a swag or a swish that clicks as hot or not in an instant.   Summer makes everyone want to be more of our animal selves and that includes more sexy-time.  It’s hot as heck but why not make it even hotter by making out with some rando guy/gal at a party, club, anywhere really.  Sweating is good for you; it purifies.  Increased heart rate is good for you; it is a mini workout without the fuss of a gym.  The discretion and knowing that it is not all that serious makes things even more fun.  If you are a long termer, have no worries, you can still partake.  Just put some kink in it.  Everyone should just giggle and flirt and let their bodies do fun animal things when it is hot.