Monday, December 14, 2015

Everything Is So Passé




It’s December and I don’t know about you all but for me it’s the most grueling of months. Holidays, New Year, winter is coming. It’s a month that you just wait for it to be over. One you endure in order to start again. In addition to the boredom of it all, there is a grumpiness that has seeped into my bones, making everything feel so blasé. With this being my mental state, I will share with you the things that irk, blah and are to me so passé in art, life and culture at the moment. Out with the old! And hopefully the New Year will bring some sparkle that doesn’t quickly fade.


Ai wei wei – Why? The art world’s frothing/fawning over this overrated artist truly reveals how impotent the art world is with politics and also how cliché.

Art Fairs – Hate em 4eva.

Artforum – It just seems so dull these days. The writing is barely intriguing, the critics choices (for the most part) are just reflection pools of the gatekeepers of a tier of art world that don’t need it as they are the fortress of it already, and the access feels like society pages. It is admirable that it is still so thick in this time of advertising collapse, but darlings, let’s be frank: it is a self perpetuating tome with not an ounce of subversion or challenge to the status quo.

Artsy – The start-up trying to mastermind art’s online platform. The most agg thing about it is its pricing schemes and it having galleries pay to have editorial written. Please, art writers of the world! Do you not have any dignity?! (As I write on a stupid blog and make no money) BUT still! Have you no dignity! It’s your brains, don’t co-opt that.

Art World Cliques – Yes, yes, yes, you are all ravageingly cool and attractive. Yes, we get that your squad rolls deep. Yes, we understand that you know the ones to know and those that others don’t even know they should know. Your Matrix like entering and exiting the building has been noted. Now. Why don’t we all just relax, make eye contact and remember that people are interesting and have a lot to offer and learn from.

Being “Triggered” –Please stop self-anointing yourself and victimizing oneself in order to circulate a masked form of trolling. If there is a conversation to be had, of course have it. If there are strong emotions stirred, of course air them. Creating a tone or dialogue that only preaches to the choir or is one-sided is not a conversation but just a version of the things that one should detest.

Bragging/Self Promotion Online – You are fabulous and somehow are at every party, opening, and time zone all at once. Your CV is a blistering docket of accolades. You work hard. You deserve your rewards but maybe just on occasion chill on the need for affirmation. It’s not a good look and it’s tiresome for those repeatedly exposed to it.

Bushwick – Always hated it. Still hate it.

Celebrities at Art Fairs – Who Cares???!!!! And if you do, you are in the wrong industry. And if you do and you have power in this industry, then F-you for making this into farce.

Contemporary Art Daily – I don’t think I have checked this site for months. It was a hot little thing but its function has faded (was there even a function?). There is nothing surprising, it is just creating a catalog that feels like a photography/installation shots lighting handbook.

Ceramics – I really don’t need to see anymore sloppy, wobbly, smiley-faced ceramics for at least six months.

Dating – Like, Jesus, h, oh my god. Dying alone. Also, dating in/around the NYC art world is possibly the most, dull, cringe thing ever.

Gagosian – It’s become so big that it’s become irrelevant.

Gluten Free – Fine you have something wrong with your guts or it makes you have gas or you are trying to skim off some pounds. Fine. But it is nearly killing me when I see things like seltzer, peanuts, bags of carrots say “Gluten Free” on them. If you don’t know what is gluten free, you are probably doing it wrong.

Group Shows – When reading off the list of artists in a group show and you can already imagine what that show will look like, take a step back and ask yourself, ‘Do we really need to do this.’ If you look at a list of artists for a group show and you think, ‘This might fail,’ then definitely do it.

Karaoke Art After Parties – If you’re going to sing – Love these. If you’re going to just look cool in the corner and sip vodka sodas – Go away.

LES Galleries – Some are good of course but the overall feeling when one pops into the hundreds of spaces in this area, it feels a bit sad and reflects poorly on the state of contemporary art, especially young artists. Everyone is so good at making the money that there is little edge left. But hey, that’s the goal right?

Social Media Jobs – Can we all collectively agree to stop trying to use social media in such fascicle ways? I’m not sure how to make it better but what’s happening surely is dull.

This Blog – Every time someone tells me they read my blog a little part of me dies inside.

V-Files – When something that could have been cool just became a glorified cultural accessory. (I am obviously not here to make friends).

The Whitney’s Current Shows – Seems like sucha downer compared to it’s opener. Here’s to hoping things get better the next time around.